Est. 1887 · For the married angler
It looks like a fishing app. It’s a forecast for your marriage.
Track her cycle and her moods, and the almanac tells you when to bring flowers, when to have the hard talk, and when to keep the boat in the harbour. Anyone glancing at your phone sees tide charts and bite forecasts.
Free. No account. Your log stays on your phone.
⚓Tap the fish three times and every forecast shows its real meaning. Tap three more and it’s back to trout.
Plate I
A field guide to the lingo
Every word in the almanac is fishing talk. Here’s what it means once the decoder ring is on.
- Forecast
- How likely she is to be in the mood
- Waters
- A good day for a difficult conversation
- Sailing
- Odds of a yes to a night out with the boys
- Bait
- How much flowers or a thoughtful gesture will land
- Storm
- Risk of tension. Do the dishes unasked.
- Red Tide
- Her period
- Spring Tide
- Ovulation, the peak of the month
- Storm Front
- The PMS window
- Water conditions
- Her mood today, from Glassy calm to Hurricane
- Landed one
- You know what this means
Plate II
The tide chart
A month at a glance, shaded from poor to excellent. Switch between Forecast, Waters, Sailing, Bait and Storm to plan date night, the budget talk or the golf weekend.
- Logged and expected red tides marked on every month
- Tap any day for its forecast and to log it
- A 7-day forecast on the home screen
Plate III
How the forecast works
- I
Log the red tide
Tap Red tide on the days she has her period. After a couple of months the almanac knows her real cycle length instead of guessing 28 days.
- II
Note the water conditions
One tap a day for her mood, from Glassy calm to Hurricane. The forecast learns how each part of her month actually goes.
- III
Read the forecast
Every day gets a score for romance, hard talks, asking to go out, and how far a gesture will go, plus plain advice on what to do about it.
The forecast starts from the textbook cycle: energy rising after her period, a peak around ovulation, and shorter fuses in the days before the next one. Every body is different, so your daily logs pull it toward how her month really goes.
Nothing leaves your phone
- No account, no sign-up, no server. The log book lives in your phone’s browser.
- On the home screen it’s just “Almanac” with a fish on it.
- Works offline, out on the actual lake.
- Back up and restore your log book to a file whenever you like.
Rules of the river
- The fish always decides. A bad forecast is a reason to be kinder, never to push.
- Trust what you see over what the almanac says.
- This is not a contraceptive or a medical device.
- Flowers are never the wrong call.
Plate IV
Put it on your home screen
iPhone
Open the almanac in Safari, tap the Share button, then Add to Home Screen.
Android
Open the almanac in Chrome, tap the ⋮ menu, then Install app or Add to Home screen.